Carolyn, I miss you!

Rev. Diannia Baty
Carolyn, I miss you!
This is about my dear cousin. I love her dearly. She has since passed over into the light. Breast cancer took her away from me. I taught her how to play and be silly again. Okay, I am going to tell on myself. We would drink carbonated soda and have burping contests on long trips. She would giggle like a girl and so would... I.
We took a drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway one day and at one of the stops there was a gentle rolling hill that had been freshly mowed. I dared her to roll down the hill with me We rolled down the hill at least a dozen times laughing all the time. We were out of breath and happy. She looked into my eyes and told me once again she loved me and there were tears in her eyes. The threat of death was not present at these moments. She was dying and we both knew it. We played until she could not play.
I was determined to squeeze all the moments of joy and happiness that I could during her final months. It is all about the living and not being somber and morose. Those silly happy times sustain me now and bring a smile to my face.
If you know someone who is going through something like this...celebrate life with them and find some joy. It is always there. Watch a three stooges movie with them. Play with the dog together. Blow some bubbles in the park. This is the only way to go as far as I am concerned.
She told me that she never though dying could be so much fun! I will never forget that statement or forget her.
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Let the Chips Fall

Do what you do with compassion and grace, and let the chips fall where they will. Do whatever you do with excitement and a sense of joy and adventure. Do whatever you do as though there is no tomorrow for you and that whatever you do is on your last day. What do you want people to take away from your life?
None of us know when we will draw our last breath but we know it will happen. Here is the math. There is only one you and you have this unique life opportunity in which to be totally you! If you aren't totally you during this lifetime that is a gift to you, chances are that you will live your entire life not being you!
There is no pain quite like the pain of missed chances, actions not taken and words not spoken. It is a hard thing to be you at times but it is far easier when you do it with compassion and grace and a sense of joy and adventure.

Let go and allow yourself to live your life...
Be clear about what IS important!
Be clear about what NEEDS to happen!
Be clear about what you WANT to do!
Your life will unfold around that vision and sense of direction that YOU created!
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Doe And Fawn

In the cemetery after the grass had been freshly cut came the mother and the baby.
They were very tentative at first. The doe was hungry and the smell of the fresh cut grass was intoxicating to her. I watched them from a distance. They knew I was there but did not seem alarmed. I sent feelings of love and peace to them and let the mother know through my thought projections that all was well. I kept expecting them to run off into the surrounding woods but they didn’t. I was so grateful to be able to witness them. The beauty of the doe and her fawn will stay with me forever.
I decided to sit on the ground and just watch. After the mother had nibbled for a while on the grass she came closer and suddenly just laid down. I could not have been more thrilled. She was totally relaxed and just needed to rest. I only dared to take one photo. They remained there after I got up to leave. I have often wondered if I had some food that day if I could have fed them from my hands.

That morning I had been feeling restless and ill at ease for some inexplicable reason and couldn’t seem to tap into my spiritual center. I had been feeling this way for a few days and couldn’t shake it off.


I grabbed my camera, a blanket and some writing materials and set off to find the peace I had asked God for that day. There are no coincidences in life. This is what was sent to me to experience. I originally wanted to take some photos of the memorial stones. There were some beautiful grave stones in this cemetery. I was currently writing a series of articles on death to help people understand it.
As I watched this scene unfold in front of me I was filled with peace and the message I got was clear. I had been immersed in this subject of death for so long and had given so many workshops on it and grief counseling that I had forgotten to fill up my own cup. I was too busy filling up the cup of others. My cup was almost empty. No wonder I was feeling restless and not at peace. I was being shown a wonderful example of life and renewal. I understood and took the guidance that God had given me on that day and slowed down a bit and added back into my life the things that always gave me human joy. It was time to refill my own cup. When I got home I took a long scented bubble bath and played some of my favorite music. I did some gardening that always grounds me. That night I made a great salad and used some of the herbs I grew. I turned off the phone and the computer and lit some candles.
I sat in blissful meditation for a long time and communed with God and I couldn’t have been more content. My restlessness and unease was totally gone.
I was also reminded that “ask and you will receive is not just a bunch of empty words.”
I often think of this day and each time I am filled with peace. Is your cup a little empty? If it is then maybe the thing to do is get back on track with God. He will always answer your requests and help you re-fill the cup of life. It is a good idea to back away from the busyness of life. The world will not stop turning because you didn’t answer the door or the phone or yet another e-mail. In order to effectively
serve others; I have to serve myself first. Do you recall what a cup of coffee or tea looks like when there is just a little left in it and it has been sitting for a while? It is unappetizing with just the dregs left in it. I think you get the picture.

No one can take better care of you than you.
Now fill up that cup!
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